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Updates on Jinsei Bby

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May. 31st, 2016 | 01:07 am
Mood: tiredtired
Music: Lucklife - Namae wo Yobu yo

At last, the busiest time I've ever had in my life has passed. Being the head of a performer group is tiresome as hell for an introvert like me. Especially when more than half of the member is like that (-w-;). I almost instantly decided that I'm not gonna meddle with such job anymore in the future (if the future really does exist).
So, why did I become the head? Well, because people (as in seniors and classmates) kinda entrusted this group to me plus members voted me and voila. I was there for my responsibility. It was kinda pre-decided years before though, through gossips.
And because I'm the type that will do duties seriously when being entrusted.
It ended last year though, but I gotta make sure everything works fine and help my juniors if something happened. I feel like it (the monitoring(?)) is included as my duty too.

But yeah, it's all done now. My study too. Not done, but almost there.
I still have 3 classes to complete plus a thesis.
I thought this term would be a nice slow-paced term where I could finish my thesis and my college. But no. The world said no.
I was (told that I am) the number 1 candidate in the university for a regional speech contest. Yeah, lol. Me, doing speech. :|
Things happened and I ended up as the 2nd winner and thus being the contestant for the national contest. Good job, me. Ha ha.
My thesis? I haven't even touch my files since proposal. (;w;)
Besides, speech thingy is stressful enough for me. Thesis better not be in my head right now.

Okay, let's stop and write something else.

Lately my sleep has been disturbed by weird dreams. I think it started last year? I'm not really sure.
I used to sleep without dreams, or don't remember that I had dreams. Usually I had dreams only when I'm feeling down or anxious or stressed about something, and usually it was only a day or two. But lately it's almost everyday. And I'll wake up still feeling tired.
And lately, it's getting back again.....

At high school, I had this fright of looking people in the eye or even their faces. I often avoid eye contact, and when I had it worse I would just look downward all the time. Maybe this is the main reason why I can't remember faces easily. I did some research and I thought it might be part of social anxiety but I'm not sure enough. I don't even know if there is a name for this.
Since college days started, I started to try and do eye contacts when talking to classmates, and it slowly got better and better. Not actually gone, but so much better than how it was.
But it's getting back again lately.
Maybe it has connection with speech contest? I think so. lol

Well then, gotta sleep.
Can't sleep though. (>u<;)

Btw, haven't updated a lot of seiyuu things lately. Famous thing is famous, so I still be able to read big updates via facebook timeline. But no deep researches lately. No time, no energy. OTL
I miss the old days. TwT

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